Break the Negative Circle

Follow Me Out of the Dark

In life it is easy to surround ourselves with negative things, people, and places. The tale misery loves company is very very true, and people who are sad want to bring you down with them. On the other end of the specturm, positive loves company too! True it’s easier to give into the pain and fall down the pit of misery and join the people down there.  The reason being is because more people are negative and ready to drag you under then those who are positive trying to pull you up. The question is who do you lean towards the cliffs of despair or the mountain of joy?

The other day I saw someone posting sad thoughts on Facebook about when will life get better and seeing all the response was shocking to me. People actually told this person that, “It may seem like it gets better only to be granted with more and more poo flung at you, cause life is one big giant poo storm.” This right here made me want to tell  that person to stop listening to them and allowing that negative person in their life. Then to that person who sent that response, I wanted to send him some kind words to not be a debbie downer.  Sad part, is you can’t these people to stop being negative, to stop listening to negative feedback,, and to stop sharing negative thoughts.

Today, I will tell all of you about the joys of positive attitudes as I always do. The negative people and feelings will always be there and it is easy to give into the demons of sadness, but you got to stay strong. The will to live keeps us going, the will to be strong keeps us alive, the will to be positive is the answer to one heck of a great life. Yes bad things will happen, but with a positive outlook you can find the silver lining and see how to work through the issue better. As a negative person when something bad happens it is blown out of the water and they are so blinded by negative thoughts that they just sink deeper and deeper without seeing things clearly. The negative person can’t think through the problems cause all they see is the pain, where as a positive person can take the step back and remove what happen and go through the steps one by one to figure out what to do to get through it.

In the end of the day, you can choose to listen to the group of negative people or join the few who are climbing and not listening to the nay sayers. It will seem hard to get rid of the people who are always down, see no light, and want to bring you down with them, but once you are free you will see the world in a different light. My advice is drop the negative in your life, that means all the drama on Facebook you need to close, all the drama at work you need move on from, and all the drama with friends you need to end. Step into the light and out of the darkest to see the beautiful world.

Leaving the darkness is key in this savage world; that you are no longer just living in, but beginning to own!!

 

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Not For Granted

Enjoy the beauty

Many times in our lives we take the ones that are always around for granted. This goes from friends, family members, coworkers, employees, etc. We always feel that once we build that bound they will always be around. Maybe they have done something for you time and time again that they become very much apart of what you need. The thing is don’t take em for granted.

Sometimes we have those friends that always wants to do something or talk, but we kind of brush them off. We know if there isn’t anything to do or something is needed, they will be there.  You know this person, the one who is super nice, but not really important because you always have something better to do or be at. Let me ask you, what would happen if this person would stop calling, texting, and checking in on you? Would you still reach out to them? Five years from now will you miss that comfort level and trust?

Chances are yes, if you take for granted someone who tries to reach out and be a friend, but never giving them a true reason to stick around, then you will lose them. People get sick of being the on call friend or if the poo hits the fan type deal. This person is also the one who you usually take advantage of , because for a time they allow it.

Everyone does this and some of us also are the ones who have it done to us if not all of us. It’s not a good thing or feeling to be taken for granted off. This is something that this written has been working real hard at lately, reaching out to old friends, working on relationships, to let everyone that I care and want to make them know how much they mean.

People come and go in our lives so quickly to maintain a friendship is very hard work, esp if it’s over 100 miles away. It may not seem fruitful, but let me tell if you can maintain it, then you will enjoy the fruits of the labor. Though if you don’t you will begin to lose that friend into the deep sea, most likely never heard from again.

Today the lesson, I want you to take is don’t take your friends for granted. They may seem like a bore, but if you abuse their friendship and give it false hope, because you like the attention, now is the time to cut the cord or be more open with them. The time for taking people for granted should be over, because you never know when they will be gone for good.

Don’t take anything for granted in this Savage World; that you are no longer living, but beginning to own!

Embrace What You Have

Love it!

Every morning I wake up in my own bed and think about what I have, which is  two dogs, a beautiful wife, and an amazing family that is always there.  I use to always say, I don’t have this or that and I want this and that. In this life with flashing commercials, friend’s pictures on Facebook, etc, we forget sometimes what we have. That’s why every morning before I get up, I look around my room to see what I have and remember what is waiting for me.

Lately there is too much talk about not having this, the money, the car, whatever it may be. Everything that you can buy is just in the end worthless if you look at it, if you can afford it and then get it now, by all means go out have a blast if you are response. Don’t buy things because you think it looked great on Beyonce so it has to look great on you.. (note her dress probably cost $500) Just cause your friend got a brand new sports car because they could afford doesn’t mean you and your family of five have a need or use for it.

Truth is no matter who you are, you will always want something either from the past, the store, love, friends, etc. It’s loving what you have at the moment that makes life so great! Sure you can have million dollars, a supermodel wife or baseball star husband. But the trick is if you want stuff like that you need to work very hard for it. Also, once you get it, you may not want it.

Many times we focus on what we don’t have and not what we do have. Today, I want you to stop saying and THINKING about what you don’t have. Start noticing what you have. Hate your job? Be thankful you have one, many other would kill for that right now! Hate the government, make a positive stand by becoming involved in politics. Want a million dollars? Find ways to work hard and set a realistic timeline on when you can reach that million mark. But for right now, take a deep look at your life and notice what you have. You will be surprised how lucky you truly are.

Embracing your life is key in this Savage World; that you are no longer just living in, but beginning to own!

It Flows Down Hill and Time to End It

All the way down!

Every knows that poo flows down hill and somehow the person at the bottom gets hit the hardest with it. In life when people at the top get bad news they somehow manage to take it out on the person below them who in turn take it out on the person below them, etc. till basically we have a giant pile of poo on the last person. Something needs to change if we are the ones doing this or the ones receiving this at the bottom.

As some of you may know, I am a very direct person who doesn’t like poo being thrown at me. I fight for the little guy and try to make sure even when bad news is received on my end not to have it affect my company, friends, and family.

The thing I learned in my time when I actually work for someone else, was that when it rains it pours and personally, didn’t like when it happened. Never wanted to be the person who would lash at others for nothing they did wrong. To many time managers/bosses hold this power of their employees, parents over their kids, and siblings over their siblings. Is it fair of them who have the power to lash out at their underlings, because they got yelled for something they did? No, it’s not fair and we need to fix it.

As a person in power people look up to you and respond to what you do. If you are the type of person who lashes out, rips apart the ones under you, and destroy their positive energy, the thing is you are doing it wrong. That’s right just cause you’re in power does not give you the power to treat others who work hard with you poorly.

For example a manager comes into work yesterday, gets yelled at by her boss because she isn’t doing something right, her kids are annoying her, and she may get a divorce. This manager in turns goes after her workers, yelling at them, closed-door meetings telling them how bad they are messing up, and providing zero positive feedback. Now, how does this make a company look? Pretty darn bad if you ask me.

If you are a manager or person like the manager we read about, then you need to stop. The harm you are doing to your life and/or company is huge. Once you start demoralizing your employees, friends, and family, it will take weeks to years to regain everything you lost in a fit of rage. Why do you ask? Well look at it this way, your employees can’t perform well if they are working in fear or being nagged at every day. You want the best results, give them a good balance of trust and positive vibes.

Once you start that rage you start to break down people you do it to. The pile of poo with rise and rise quickly and do you know how hard it is to clean off a pile poo? Pretty hard and it’s pretty nasty. Those employees that work under you are your lifeline in your job, yea you can throw them under the bus, fire them, etc. but if they are honestly doing a great job, working hard, and doing what is need to be done, you better start looking out for them. Once you throw out that rage and flinging the poo, well that once awesome employee will turn scared, bitter, and hateful. You don’t want that, especially with your best employees, cause once they live and go to your rivals what are you going to do then?

My advice is, if you have a bad day or you get poo flung at you. Don’t respond by flinging more poo, find the problem, talk it out and figure out how to fix it in a productive way. Don’t start throwing bodies under the bus or making everyone around you feel the wraith of your pain. End the trail with you and be the bigger person, that’s when you start to become a better person in the end.

Stopping the pile with you is key in this Savage World; that you are no longer just living in, but beginning to own!

 

 

Too Much Information

Zip it

In the world of social media and the joy of texting, our society has become fans of TMI (TOO MUCH INFORMATION). Everyone is texting, tweeting, Facebooking, etc. about every little detail about their life. You all read the stories about how your friend’s two-year old son made a funny face, seen the picture, threw up, and five minutes later you saw another one. Also we all get the updates about everyone’s life, like if Mike broke his arm he texts everyone on the way to the ER and then tweets about how hot the nurse is. Maybe it’s just me, but as a society aren’t we over sharing a little too much?

Here’s the thing, I am a very private person who doesn’t want to over share all his information to cyberspace and his friends. Not everyone needs to know where I am, what cute thing my dog did this morning I woke up, and where I am going all day.

The world loves mystery and we should allow ourselves to fall back into that. I am seriously, to the ones who post, do you read all the post that people post about themselves everyday? Chances are, probably not, so what allows you to air our all your dirty laundry to the world when you don’t read others?

So everyone instead of posting all those things in your life about XYZ, how about just taking a break from it. Post every once in a while, make it fun, upbeat, and things people want to read about. There is enough drama and sadness in the world, that we don’t need to read about yours.

Facebook and all those social media outlets are great, but use them in moderation. Don’t continue to post stories of the hamburg you just ate from Pete’s Burger Hut (unless they are paying you) or don’t post about how horrible your boyfriend/girlfriend is over the net. None of this ever ends well and honestly, we are so overloaded with information right now, that people get sick of reading it.

Life is meant to be lived, not meant to be lived on a computer screen. Go out there experience it with the people you are with. You don’t need to bring the rest of the world there with you. Everything is much better in person anyway. Enjoy the life and share stories in person, bring the human element to everything, try to cut back on the tweeting and facebooking. When you are out in public with friends and family, PUT DOWN THE PHONE… LOOK UP… DON’T TWEEK or POST ON FACEBOOK…Just enjoy the time with the people you are with.

Not over sharing is key in this Savage World; that you are no longer just living in, but beginning to own!

Changing the World

Every Hand Needed!!

Everyday on Twitter, Facebook, or any social media outlet you can think of, we are slammed with what our friends, family, and coworkers think about the world. Usually they aren’t very nice comments about the president, this law, that law, etc. Honestly, it gets kind of old hearing nothing but negative thoughts out of people’s social media outlet. Cause the kicker is, if you respond to them and you disagree, it gets ugly and it gets ugly fast!

When I was a child my father would always say, never talk about two things politics and religion. The reason is, you truly never know who you will offend. Now, when I was a child, I thought this means never talk about it even with very close friends and family who you knew their belief and where they stood on politics. Later in life, I realized that it should be discussed in a closed setting with people you know are respectful and can hear both sides.

Thing is with all the social media outlets and views on the president, government, etc. we really don’t filter ourselves much. We may see one side of the discussion and slam the door on the opposing side. It doesn’t matter if the other side has it right or wrong, the door is closed and there is no listening. When people do respond and it’s against the crowd, the person is laughed, poke fun at, etc. Now as a society does this sound right? No, the respect of others is going out the door a little.

If you want hate how the country is going, do something about it. Crying on Facebook gets you no where. Everyone can make a change either for the good or the bad. Stop looking at the negative aspects in the world and start focusing on the positive. You know, if we all started sprouting positive thoughts and messages across the internet and world, this place would be amazing.

We scream anti-bullying campaigns, but we still curse the government, our friends, family, and even the ones who are different. It’s time to wake up and change the world, stop crying over what the president said last night and how it may affect you five years from now. The thing you post on Facebook about it could break friendship, cause a family feud, or worse.

Respect is the key word in this world. You may think Facebook is the best outlet to blast your thoughts and not get caught. That’s not the case, E-bullying is very much alive as it is face to face. Remember what you say can easily offend someone. Besides, another old saying, if you don’t have anything nice to say, don’t say anything at all. Think about it next time you post or about to speak about a very sensitive subject. Change the world, by being more of a positive infulence then a negative impact.

Being a positive force is key in this Savage World; that you are no longer just living in, but beginning to own!

Don’t Let the Rain Takeover

Fend em off

You know how sometimes the weather outside can affect your mood? Same is for how people in your life affect you. This goes from your coworkers in your office to your family and friends in you every day life.  Today, lets discuss this and see how to make sure we don’t let the outside world take over our everyday life.

Lets start off with an example today about this topic. Say you are at work,  your boss comes in all stressed, because he or she is annoyed with something that is happening at home. She/he then turns around to take it out on you and your team. She/he yells, points fingers, and slams doors. This probably doesn’t help you feel better about yourself, huh? How do we handle days like this?

Here’s the trick to surviving issues like the one above with your boss or anyone else who does this. Block it out, just because they can’t handle their emotions doesn’t mean it should ruin your day. Ignore what they are doing, just nod and smile if they are going on a rant. Be there for them, but don’t take the abuse. If they attack you personally, make sure to leave before you say something you regret. Just focus on what you have to do for the day and what makes you happy.

Thing is, misery loves company a lot, the more the merrier for them. Most people who are upset don’t know how to handle their emotions and lash out quickly without thinking. They may not even realize they are hurting people they care for.  You can fight back and have a giant yelling match or you can be the bigger person and go okay, that’s how want to handle it than handle it that way. Just don’t let them bring you to their level.

It’s easy to fall into someone’s downward spiral and get involved in their every day drama. That I am truly aware of, but you can fight it with your positive attitude and holding your head up high. It’s hard, but it can be done. It’s almost human nature to try to bring people down when you’re upset, because you want people to feel crappy like you. Remember that, next time your boss or best friend comes in slamming everything around and having a little hissy.

Not falling into the drama of others is key in this Savage World; that you are no longer just living in, but beginning to own!

Making Changes

Here it comes!!!

Ever wake up in the morning and go, “Hmph, I need to make some changes in my life right now.” Chances are once or twice you woke up like that, but mostly it has been changes you been wanting to make in your head for a long time. Most of the time when you want to make a major change, you think about it and usually say, “I will do that later in life.” Today, let us talk about how to make those changes real and use some examples.

Recently, I have been wanting to make changes to how this life goes. Many things that I still need to do, but never just do them. For example, I want to get out of the country and explore the world. I want to be more productive throughout my business and personal life.  Problem is, something is always stopping me, on the travel which is the time and on the productive level, it’s just me not knowing how to balance relaxing and being productive. Answer is always, next year we will travel to Ireland, next week I will get up earlier and start working out again.

Well, today folks I am asking for your help.  This coming Monday there is going to be some changes in my life. Starting with getting up again at 5:00-5:30 every weekday morning, doing a workout, and becoming more productive. You’re help is to ask me once a day, how is my schedule going? What did you do this morning? Reach out and make sure I am doing it (if I didn’t make a small note at the bottom of the page).

Now on the flip side, I want you to do the same. Find something you want to change about yourself. Want to lose some weight, let’s do it together! Talk to me and we will hold each other accountable. Trick is, when you want to make a change you need help most of the times. A teammate in a way. Think about this, you want to get up at 5:30 AM every morning, do a thirty to sixty minute workout and then get your booty into work.  Well now is your chance, we can make things happen along the way. This blogger right here will help, please feel free to contact me to get a plan rolling for both of us. (Review the information at the bottom of this insert to get a hold of me)

Making changes in life are very important, but very hard. Many people fear change, whether it’s a new job or moving to a new city. Life is hard there is no way around it, but with friends and family by your side that support you, then it can be done. Let us know what you want to change and how this community here can help out.

Making changes in life are key in this Savage World; that you are no longer just living in, but beginning to own!

Contact info: James@savages.cc

Busy Does Not Equal Awesome

Just soo busy.. Please hold.

Lately, everyone is always so busy. With some many ways to communicate it almost seems impossible for someone not to send out a text, hop on Facebook, Twitter, Linkedin, etc.  Just seems like everything you want to do has to be pushed back till tomorrow, than tomorrow becomes next week, then next month, then next year, etc. etc.  So what happens when work always seems to get in the way and you just can’t do what you want in life anymore? I am telling you when you say you are super busy to someone, it doesn’t make you as special as you think.

Here’s the picture I want you to have in your head. Picture yourself always running, going into work early, staying late, and then coming home to work again. Your friends, reach out to you but never can get a hold of you because your cell phone is usually used for work only. The house work, it can be done later or someone else can do it.  When you actually talk to your friends on your social media page, you just always say that your just so busy with work and your extra activities so you can’t talk or meet up. But it’s okay, you tell yourself you need to do this for work and to make it better for yourself there. Does that sound like you?

Now, on the flip side of what your friends and family are hearing from you. First off, when all you do is work and don’t help around your house. Your spouse takes on much extra pressure to clean, cook, take care of the kids, pets, etc. This causes a lot of stress on your spouse to do it alone, plush their own work, and lives.

On your friends view of this; when you say you are too busy to talk they hear that they aren’t important enough for you to take five minutes to talk or even grab some coffee. Maybe your friend is hurting and needs someone to just reach out and have a shoulder to cry on. Maybe they have great news they want to share with you. Maybe…they just want to hear from you and know about your world. When they can’t reach you, they lose faith in you and become to go, “Okay, it’s time to move on, cause I am done trying to be your friend.”

Finally your family needs to know what is going on. When you are too busy to stop by for a ball game, a party, etc. you send a message of how unimportant that family member is. This doesn’t go for brothers and sisters, but cousins, uncles, aunts, grandparents, parents, etc.  The two busy for your own family, can hurt more than you think. It’s okay not to go to every event, but when you miss them all it sends out a massive message.

The reason, I brought this subject up today is to hit a point. As you know from Monday’s blog a good friend of mine passed away last week. I really messed up as a friend at times, I wasn’t there for him all the time and didn’t do more to reach out. Always thought he would pull through and I would have all the time in the world, sadly I didn’t. My lost time with him can never be earned, because I was always to busy for him and that wasn’t fair. That’s not fair to my friends and family, so today this blogger is going to change it.

If you are one of those people who always is too busy. The ones who can’t put the work down and always has something else they need to do. Take a minute to breathe and reach out to friends, family, and loved ones. Place the work down for an hour a night, reach out through phone calls, e-mails, Facebook, text, etc. There is so many ways to get through to your friends now that there is no longer an excuse not to.

Don’t let the moment leave you, because you don’t know what will happen to tomorrow. Your friends and family are here for such a short time. The blessings they give us are truly amazing. Don’t let it slip away, because you were too busy for everyone and everything.

Being balanced is key in this Savage World; that you are no longer just living in, but beginning to own!

Coming Together

Forgiven!

The holidays, are a time of joy, laughter, friends, and family. It’s a time to be thankful of everyone who is around you and all the joy they bring. This is when you forget all the bad issues you have with them and start anew. The most wonderful time of the year is true.

Too many times we hold on to past issues and just move on with our lives. You can spend a life time hating a friend or family member who you think caused you pain, or you can forgive and move on. Why waste your energy hating them? When you could just move on from the issue and spend time with them again.

Think about this, thirty years from now you start to miss that family member or friend. You begin regretting the stupid thing you did to them or got about. This can lead you to a life time of trying to find them and just saying the words, I am sorry and I love you, lets move on from this. The other option is, you could lose them and never get that chance. In the end, what ever happen truly doesn’t matter.

Instead think of it this way, the holidays are coming up and try to open your heart. Forgive them for the wrong they that is out there and tell them it’s okay. Your sister or brother could really use you right now or that friend really needs a talk with an old friend.

Pride gets you nowhere fast in this world. To always be right never allows you to learn from your wrongs. End the year right and give the gift of caring/forgiveness this year. It’s just the best thing to do in this world, at times.

Coming together is key in this Savage World; that you are no longer just living in, but beginning to own!